Where’d you come from?

Happy April Showers! Here in DC, it’s rained more in the past month than I think ever in the almost 20 years I’ve lived here, so in the moments when the sun does shine, the flowers are stunning. Nevermind the fact that it’s not even May yet!

In the past few weeks, I’ve been reminded many times of “where I come from,” in the literal sense and as it relates to my career. 

I’ve been doing genealogy research to get to know and better understand my late father, who passed away in 2015, two weeks before my 30th birthday. I’ve discovered some pretty surprising things. In short (and without giving anything away because I’m a writer and I smell another book here), I know more about my father than he ever knew about himself, and that is incredibly powerful. I’m even more grateful for the life I’ve built for myself, because it was only made possible by generations before me making some really questionable decisions. It makes me think that everything we do and say counts, even the smallest gesture. 

I felt this even more pressingly when I attended a 100 Women in Finance event on April 4 at Cambridge Associates in Arlington, VA, where I worked as an editor before deciding to go to business school. I worked with Celia Dallas, now the Chief Investment Strategist for the whole firm, back when she was “just” Head of Investment Research. After Celia and the guys on her team wrote their research papers, I proofed them and prepared them to be published, a job that felt insignificant at the time, but introduced me to the world of institutional investing and changed my life.

The thing that made the biggest impression on me in that job, though, was Celia. I admired how she ran her team of guys (yes, all men back in 2009–11) and how much they respected her. Whenever she went on vacation, she put up an out of office and made it clear that she was away to spend time with her family, especially her three children, who were in elementary school at the time. I once asked for her to review something quickly before she ran into a meeting, and she told me she couldn’t because she needed to get to the meeting — admittedly, I was miffed, because it would only have taken her a few seconds, but in retrospect, this was a monumental lesson for me in setting boundaries.

It was such a joy to see Celia at the event and fill her in on all of my career twists and turns, but mostly to thank her for being her. I think she might not have realized the impression those small things she did almost 15 years ago made on me, but that’s further proof that everything we do or say counts.  

And finally, when Georgetown calls and asks me to talk to undergrads about how to navigate career obstacles, I can’t say no! I was so honored to be a panelist at the 11th annual Diversity Dialogue Conference, which was run by undergrads themselves, which is so impressive. 

Telling these kids (sorry, Young Adults) my story and encouraging them to take the reins of their own was beyond meaningful, especially doing it on campus, in a building in which I almost always felt uncomfortable and undeserving. To return to that space after all the work I’ve done to know myself almost made me giddy. 

During the networking reception, I spoke with a young man who wants to be in business, but is also a creative writer. I spoke with a young woman who was the first in her family to go to college, so she wasn't sure what it looked like to have a career in business. I spoke with a young woman who was very curious about my therapy journey because she'd been on a similar one. In conclusion, I felt the difference I was making not just with my words, but with my existence, showing these kids (sorry, Young Adults) what is possible, just by my being in the room. 

What is the story you want to tell about who you are, where you’ve been, and where you’re going? Once you know that everything counts, you’ve got nothing to lose. 

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That time I hollered laughing at a conference